


Who The Fuck is Dolores?!?

by Emotional_Spaniard



Series: Hargreeves One Shots [1]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Arguing, F/M, Five is lonely, Five is not good at relationships, Post Apocalypse, The store scene lmao, dolores - Freeform, pre apocalypse, reader - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-02
Updated: 2019-04-02
Packaged: 2020-01-01 04:52:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18328994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emotional_Spaniard/pseuds/Emotional_Spaniard
Summary: (Y/N) gets mad when they’re shot at in the store just because Five wants to find Dolores.Who the fuck is Dolores?And then you find out it’s a fucking mannequin.





	Who The Fuck is Dolores?!?

**Author's Note:**

> Guys, let’s be honest.   
> Five and Dolores is the cutest love story in the whole fandom world lmao x

 

Five, as great as he is, smart, cute, can be a complete and utter  _asshole_ at times. Especially when you’re trying to live up to the expectations of being his cute little girlfriend. Which, currently, is what you’re trying to do. But he’s an asshole, and keeps disappearing to try and find some  _eye,_ or some... other thing. You have no idea what that ‘other thing’ is, though. 

Because Five’s great, really. 

But he’s cryptic as fuck. 

And it’s really fucking annoying. 

“But where are you  _going?_ ” You ask, for the six thousandth time today. 

“To the store.” 

“It’s closed.” 

“Ah.” He points a finger at you. “But is it?” 

Uhm,  _yes?_ “Yes Five, it is fucking closed. Closed. C-L-O-S-E-D.” 

Rolling his eyes and dragging a blue bag over his shoulder, he raises one eyebrow. “You don’t need to spell it out for me, I’m not a child.” 

“Ah,” you mimick, pointing a finger at him. “But you look like one.” 

He glares at you, but the corner of his mouth tilts up at the side, “ _Low blow.”_

“You know I love you, though.” 

With that sarcastic adorable look on his face, he gives you a mini side hug and kisses your forehead. “I know. I love you too, I’ll be back soon.”

_Lmao, that’s what he thinks._

”Sure.” 

 

Five wasn’t lying. He  _was_ going to the store. But you weren’t lying either. The store was closed. 

Now, what the  _fuck_ was Five doing at a closed store, with a flashlight and a duffel bag? 

Okay, now this is getting weird. Why was he standing infront of the mannequin? What’s so special about a fucking mannequin? 

You saw the two people first. With guns. But by the time you’d noticed, they’d already started shooting. At Five. 

“FIVE!!” 

He quickly grabs the mannequin, and runs down the aisles to reach your worried screams.

“(Y/N)? What are you doing here?” 

“Uhm. Five, people are shooting at you! What are  _you_ doing here?” 

He looks at you as if you’re stupid. “Getting Dolores.” 

“Who the fu-“ You’re cut off by more gunfire and your own terrified screams.

“Shit! (Y/N), we need to move. I’ll explain later, I promise.” 

“You better fucking explain.” 

 

“God, Five. You’re a fucking idiot.” 

Smiling up at you sarcastically, he pays your fussing hands away. “Thanks. I appreciate it.” 

You perch on the edge of the bed, fiddling with a bobble on your wrist subconsciously. “So, who’s Dolores? Cause I’ve been through this before, and I swear-“

”It’s the mannequin.” 

You pause. A mannequin. “It’s...” you take a deep breath and press your fingers to your head. “It’s the mannequin?” 

He smiles fondly, “Yep.” 

“A FUCKING MANNEQUIN? YOU ALMOST GOT FUCKING KILLED OVER A FUCKING MANNEQUIN? A MANNEQUIN?!?!” 

“How dare you. Dolores isn’t more than that.” 

You blink. Slowly. “She’s the girl, isn’t she? The one you told me you met? The Apocalypse?” 

“Yep.” 

Trying to take him seriously is getting harder by the minute. “Five... are you okay?” 

“Yep.” 

“Sure?” 

“Yep.” 

Again, you blink. Slowly. “Can you not... can you not just say ‘yep’, for a sec, Five?” 

“Sure.” 

Dismiss the urge to punch him, you tell yourself. Just.. push it away. But it’s so damn hard. 

“Okay... okay. Let’s make a rule, yeah? I don’t treat you like a child, and you stop giving me one word answers.” 

“You’re not treating me like a child, you think I’m crazy.” 

You nod, slowly. “I’m starting to think that.” 

“You have to understand that I was lonely, (Y/N). She was the only one there.” There’s a slight sadness in his eyes, and now you feel bad for shouting earlier on. 

“Sorry, Five.” 

“It’s okay. Come here, now I want cuddles.” 

Five can be an asshole. 

But he can also be the sweetest guy in the world. 


End file.
